#poetry - Wake up and smell the roses

"Wake up and smell the roses"

First comes will, then energy,
Then it finds you after you find it,
Then comes curiosity with innocence,
and love and warmth and light.

Next comes the first lie and
in the fall out you cry though,
it was comparatively small but,
it makes you feel paradise lost.

Then you adjust and counter and
begin to lie as well and join
the ranks and participate and
still have love but hurt and feel.

Then the well in you fills
and brims with a sorrow
driven by all you could have said
and done with more truth.

Then the weight of your well
so deep and full halts you fully
and you sink in some form of despair
and begin to think your self is lost.

Then you learn to cope in some way
and drain some of your well
till it fills again and you repeat
and start to polish a human life.

But then just maybe you leave
your well unguarded and unchecked
until it fills and brims and floods
the entire plane upon which you stand
                 and take for granted.

Now you must sincerely dwell
until you find the root and the source
of your well; now you must go down there
against the grain of fear, diving deep.

You have mishaps and fear and anxiety
and nearly drown on the way, but still you go
and little by little you build fortitude
and wind and skill, diving to your pearl.

Then you come like a rocket out of your own deep
with pearl in hand and a glowing smile on face,
and you are then with open rejuvenated heart
and a mind born free and flowing with thought.

And you return to all you love
and return very true but little wise,
you cannot yet know the nature
of the fear in their eyes.

Then you rattle around the walls
of other folks' brains and incite
them to action of good and bad intent
and take their shame and receive harm from them.

Then you open a door to Patience
and go along with a loved one
out of trust; it is next when
Patience and trust meet, that it begins.

You yield the best of you to the best of them,
And in comes more light and vision,
And you yield control and simply be,
while they yield to you both love and skill.

And through the gentle rush of it all,
by the kindness, for the will,
because you are ready and so are they,
next you open up your eyes

and you see the waves of heat
and you smell the Roses
and you know then God is with you
and you know then heaven has come to earth.

#poetry - angel's descent

when i step from this space balloon,
seventy-five thousand feet above earth,
i am alone in the cosmos.

a gamma ray chorus tingles my ear drums,
a wild ice bursts my finger tips,
a faint cinnamon scent, gathering moisture,
hyper-ventilating in my face mask—-

but when i step, i spring
     this fatal swan dive.


caught in the lightest air,
an extreme atmosphere, thin,
where no sense of motion or weight
feathers my arching body
and gives no resistance to my entry.

there comes now a myriad thrill,
a rainbow stinging of dots in my eyes
flashing of vision.

i behold a third of the earth's surface,
the rockies, the andes, timeless glory, rust on a car,
florida's phallic thrust into a gaping gulf
brazil's bulging belly, fertile, alive
a pock-marked and nuked nevada desert, thirsty for my blood.

what brought upon this lonely height
and spurred the first step of this launch—-
why does an angel descend, a wingless final flight?

a sure understanding of abandon,
felt for a moment, so then felt forever,
   abandon, a ceaseless wrench of the abdomen,
   an invitation to nevermore.



when i knew how
you turned away
and that was all
         
                         

but now in my whirring glee, dream or ecstasy,
where my life winds down by terminal velocity,
six hundred miles an hour pushing earth to this body,
i see your face again in these clouds

above wyoming
which would be a fine place to go.

you smile your kind carefree way.
i feel it, even of clouds,
your face melts my core.

what have i done?
what have we done?
done is done.

                                     
to give you space, i floated to heaven,
but staring only at heaven,
by long and lonely ascent,
wears on my life's purpose.


i miss you


so i have jumped
from my space balloon,
and now born of this heaven,
without wings,
i loom for a short while
over the world of men.

i fall to a place you may find,
by then a grave of sand,
with a canyon of stone at my head.