Sunday, September 4, 2011

#Fiction -- in that nowhere place, NAS

i'll go on and take it happily from you. and by you and what you say, it must be true. go on and let it be thus. to myself and others---all that NAS happens to say is truth. i'm in that nowhere place right now, NAS---means nothing that i know i'm here. the bastards are here with me. fire-heat and noise of no origin steps forward with claim---could not be yet they do.

and not a thing contemplated in passing nor with a fully developed conscious shield conscience between you(me) and it. like cavemen who think about stars while looking at them, see the melting string cheese of it all. always beaming the connection never broken---those damn stars even after supernova appearing, all of them the same, to be here on this earth just as well as they are where they are and just as that! has always been the truth.

and you go out walking afterward and you see the eyes and the knowledge from those eyes, thirsty to drink from your cup---here is the quantum singularity meeting ground for trans-dimensional travelers making best use of the belt-way anima built long ago for them, populating the bodies with diverse mind. sometimes multiple-hugging in and overlapping and cacophonating withing a single voice box. sometimes sword fighting play fighting shadow playing verbal sparring jazz riffing between multiple bodies. always anything absolutely you can think of, it can be and does---this being in every way you can think of whether you know you are thinking it or not.

i thought i was about to sleep or was sleeping. i thought i was exhausted. i had that feeling i had been talking on the phone a long time, but a long time ago, with someone dear to me and that i or she or both fell asleep and the phone was still to my ear and the connection was still alive and that with waking i felt an urge to check to see if she was still there, awake and waiting for me to respond to her latest breath.

and i said "what?"

and i heard "so."

and i had to be silent and weather an ice cold rush in my stomach and up around my temples when i realized i was not holding a phone and there was no phone. but i had heard a voice. and i was alone. and then my legs kicked without me asking them to kick.

and her voice said "boom."

and my breathing got thick, NAS. and i'm not a rookie at this and i'm just writing you now. and already i feel better. well, i know i shouldn't because out there they are waiting. but i am going for a cigarette. if i must, i will see you on the otherside of whatever is opposite the otherside. here's to heavy eyelids in the middle of nowhere.

i'll split a vial of codeine with you. seventeen pots of the blackest coffee. well those will be for me. all for you will be 144 tea bags of chosen by you assortment. two cartons of cigarettes. 8 cases of beer. seven bottles of wine. thirteen loaves of air tight stowed french baguette. sharp white cheddars. and gruyeres. and asiagos. two bottles of extra virgin olive oil. one bottle of peppercorns with a built in grinder. two boxes of clementines, about 84 clementines in all. 48 individual pita shells. two gallons of spiced humus. one pint of your homemade hot sauce. 36 whole wheat hamburger buns matched to 36 veggie burger patties. 3 gallons pink grapefruit juice. 6 liters seltzer water. 20 fluid ounces or more of the worst tasting whiskey money or good looks can buy.

six blankets each. two thick pillows. two ipods with 18,000 songs and 25 lithium battery reserves matching a bose sound dock. and though not necessary, 1 ounce of green dragon dust, a 1/2 ounce of this variety a 1/2 ounce of that. and 2 tubs of american spirit free leaf with 400 rolling papers, and the night sky, and 1/4 cord of season dry wood. and three keys of harmonicas, a, b-sharp, d.

and the stage i we shall split.  take turns with the spirits who enter and redefine us awhile while we howl and yield to impulse and dance. to this interpretive dance, and that interpretation, and this extemporaneous story, of that original being or of being without origin. and to bring each other back one will hold the other, draw heart to heart, and retrain the other mind to the soulness of its mate.

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